I love this quote, because as my fellow Sickle Cell Warriors know: we don’t have a choice but to get back up and continue the fight. Hey Readers, hope you all love this quote as much as I do. Be encouraged!
Hey Readers! I’ve been sick a lot lately, so I haven’t been able to blog the way I would like. Not to worry though, I’m back on my writing now, so I’ll be updating you guys a lot. This blog is basically going to be me venting, so bare with me. Well, as you all know by now, I have Sickle Cell Disease; and it’s very true that in a lot of ways I’m not able to do what other people can. I get that – hate it – but I get it. The problem I have with this is when everybody treats me like I’m going to literally break if I try to do ANYTHING! I understand that I have to pace myself when doing things, but dang!… that doesn’t mean my life should come to a complete halt and sit around doing nothing day-in and day-out. I don’t think people really understand how demeaning that is. Don’t get me wrong, I know that when someone does this to me, it’s done out of love; but I’m a grown woman, it feels terrible to always be looked at as less than. I’m mostly seen as this sickly person that needs to be looked after, it just sucks… I try not to let stuff like this get to me – because once again – I know it’s not done in a malicious way; but I’m only human, so of course it does get to me at times. I mean really, how old do I have to get before people start seeing me as an adult?? Logically I know that my age isn’t the problem, it’s the sad but very real fact that I have a disease that is killing people daily. So, I guess all I can do is understand the reason I am treated the way I’m treated, but also continue to try getting them to understand my point of view. Writing these blogs also help, it’s my way of venting and getting things like this off my chest. I’m not mad though, more frustrated than anything. I love my family to death though, so I can’t hold this against them, when I know they’re just trying to protect me the best way they know how. Alright Readers, I’m going to keep this blog short. Later guys!
Hey my fellow Sickle Cell Warriors, and my lovely Readers! I just wanted to do a quick blog updating you all on how my hospital visit is going; this won’t be too long because I’m going to be doing a vlog soon also. Well, sadly I’m still in the hospital, I’ve been here now for a week and I’m sooo ready to leave! I thought for sure I would be leaving today, but of course, that’s not the case. The Doctor put me on a Magnesium I.V. drip, so I know I won’t bee going anywhere today. Hopefully tomorrow (fingers crossed). As you all know, today is Easter; I was really looking forward to being home with my family for today, but that’s not the case. I knew I wouldn’t be well enough to go to church or anything, but I would at least be able to spend Easter Sunday with my family, and have a nice big dinner with them. But, as my Warriors know all too well: Sickle Cell Disease has a mind of its own, and could care less about what we want to do, or have planned. So, here I am, alone and in the hospital on a holiday (once again). There is a bright side to this though… my parents came to the hospital, which I kinda figured they would. But when they got here, they had a gorgeous vase of white lilies and roses for me! They are so pretty, and the smell has the whole room smelling good. They also got me a big chocolate bunny, anyone that knows me, know I love chocolate. I know to some, this may not sound like much, but when you’re cooped up in the hospital with absolutely nothing to do, and you’re feeling down about being there, the littlest things can make you smile. Plus I don’t get flowers when I’m in the hospital, because I’m always there. Sadly, I’m not the only one that’s sick today: my brother is also sick. He started hurting today, and I think they said he was hurting all over, too…..but my brother is so hardheaded! He never goes to the hospital, he just stay home in terrible pain. I don’t know why he does that, especially when he is always lecturing me about going to the hospital. Oh well, I just hope he gets well soon, I hate when my brother is in pain, especially since I know exactly how bad that pain can be. Anyway, I hope you all had a great Easter Sunday, and to all my fellow Warriors: STAY STRONG!
Hey Readers, I’m going to start back doing my Quote Of The Day, blogs. I really enjoy reading and finding the right one, I really hope you all enjoy them as well. When I read this one I could really relate to it; I may cry a lot when I’m in pain from a Sickle Cell crisis, or from frustration, but that by no means makes me a weak person, nor my fellow SC Warriors.
Hey Readers, this blog is just going to be a little update of what’s been going on with me lately. Well, as some of you may recall, I was having very bad stomach pains for awhile. It was to the point where I was constantly in the hospital. Well, they finally figured out that it was the medicine they had me on that was causing the problems. Once we got the stomach pains under control, I was actually out of the hospital for a while, and doing good. I was able to finally plan something and not miss it because I was sick. I went to Orlando with my family, for a nice little visit with some of my family there. It was great to finally be out of the hospital, and doing things that are so simple but so enjoyable at the same time. I had a great time there. The day we left, I started hurting, but thankfully it didn’t get bad until after we had made it home. I ended up having to go to the hospital that same night. I’m still in here now, but I’m being released today, finally. I know this is going to sound weird but, I didn’t mind getting sick this time, I was just so thankful that it happened right after my trip to Orlando, and not during. So when the pain started, I just thanked God that He allowed me to enjoy my trip fully and waited until I got home for the crisis to happen. I know that may sound strange, but when you have Sickle Cell you know that a crisis can happen whenever, wherever. So you’re thankful when a crisis doesn’t happen when you’re out at events, or on trips; because you know it easily could have. You have to know which battles to fight. I’m optimistic though, I think that once I’m released from the hospital this time, I won’t be back for awhile. The reason I was in and out of the hospital before, was because of my stomach problems, not necessarily my Sickle Cell pain. So now that that’s taken care of, it should just be my Sickle Cell now, and I’m learning how to manage it better, also. I’ve been drinking lots of fluids, especially water, which I admit, I wasn’t doing before. It amazes me how, just drinking water can help so much in keeping me from getting sick. Whatever will help, I’m down for! So we’ll see what happens; I’m actually excited about the future, which I admit, I haven’t been for awhile now. Only because I was always sick, and not able to do anything. I think things are going to start changing for the better now, and I’m going to take you all along for the ride! Get ready, I can’t wait!
Hello Readers! Well, I’m supposed to be released from the hospital today; I would usually be excited and more than ready to leave, but not this time. The reason I’m not is because I’m still having the same stomach problems. The Doctors all have different opinions on what the cause of the pain is, but they all agree that there is nothing they can do about it. I haven’t ate anything in the last 3 days, and I’ve been throwing up also. I know when I go home it’s only going to get worse. This has been a cycle for the past few years now. I just want one Doctor to come and actually try to figure out what the problem is, not guess. It’s so frustrating and draining coming back and forth to the hospital for the same problem. I already have to deal with having Sickle Cell, now I also have to deal with these terrible stomach problems. It’s one thing after another. I just want to disappear from it all, not have to feel anymore pain or visit anymore hospitals. I’m physically, mentally, spiritually, drained. I know God doesn’t put more on us than we can bare, but I feel like He’s pushing me to the max. I’m not a quitter, but I just feel like curling up in my bed and staying there. I’m only one person, my body can take only so much pain. I’m just tired, tired of it all. Sorry this blog is so gloomy, but it’s how I’m feeling right now, so…..
Hello Readers! I hope all has been well with everyone. As for me, well, not so much. I’m still in and out of the hospital, due to the Sickle Cell Crisis’s I’ve been having; and now with my stomach problems on top of that, it’s almost impossible for me to stay out of the hospital for any long period of time. I’m trying to stay positive though, hopefully I’ll get a break from being in the hospital soon…fingers crossed. Anyway, I’ve really been trying to decide on whether or not I should write blogs when I’m not in the hospital and sick. I mostly only write when I’m hospitalized, but I think I’m going to change that (whenever I’m finally out of the hospital, that is). But, I didn’t want to wait any longer to write a blog, so I just decided to do another one while here. I mean, this IS supposed to be about my trials and tribulations of living with Sickle Cell, and that definitely includes being hospitalized so…..well, I wanted to just put my thoughts out there, and see what you all think. It seems the more I get sick and therefore have to be hospitalized, the more I think about life. Not just my life but life in general. When you’re stuck in a place of no forward motion (and for me that means not being able to move on in life because of my sickness) you’re really able to have a greater respect and appreciation for life. It’s funny how, when you’re in the mist of living your day to day life, you don’t realize how blessed you truly are. I feel like, because I’m constantly sick and in the hospital, my life has come to a standstill, in a metaphorical sense, that is. I find myself daydreaming about doing things that would seem, pretty mundane to others. Like going to church, spending time with my friends and family, going out, working…don’t get me wrong, I’m not depressed or feeling sorry for myself, I just miss the act of actually LIVING life. I know there are people out there who has it worse than me, so I don’t have a right to be depressed or feel sorry for myself. I’ve really just been trying to take everything that has been going on with me, and examine it all and process it, so that I can receive the lesson that God has for me. It would be easy for me to just give up, and expect my life to always be this way, but I truly believe that in going through all that I am going through, He is preparing me for something greater to come. What that is, I have no idea; this of course, doesn’t mean that after I’m finally feeling better something great is going to happen, and I will never be sick again, of course not. I’m a realist, I know that this disease will be with me, and a part of my life, until the day I die. But I also know that, this isn’t it for me. When you’re sick so often, and have a lot of scary moments, what with: getting dangerous infections, possible blood clots, extreme crisis’s, surgery, blood transfusions, etc…of course, you think about death. When I think about death, it’s not something I fear, I just have a great amount of respect for it. I know this is my one and only life, and if this is where I’m supposed to be in life, then so be it. As long as I’m still able to live, I’m happy. Well, thanks for reading; so glad I did this blog, I just wanted to get that off my chest. Feel free to leave your comments, later Readers!